Bailey; A Farewell To My Best Friend

In the fall of 2013 my dog Bailey was put down. She was at my mom's house and one weekend she just stopped drinking water and wouldn't eat her food. When my mom called me and told me the news, I just knew it wasn't good. On the following Monday my mom and stepdad took her into the vet, I came and stayed with her for a few hours. We had blood work done and it took an hour to get the results. The results showed she had cancer in her kidneys and liver. We all knew Bailey was 13 and a half years old (around 95 in doggy years) and didn't have a good chance surviving the surgery. This visit that turned into trying to fix my dog quickly turned into saying goodbye, It was really difficult for me to say goodbye to her.

When I was in high school and was having bad days from being bullied etc she was always there. She was just filled with love and was an all around amazing dog. She had her quirks though. When you give Bailey a piece of your sandwich or something she will eat the first couple bites then she would run off and hide it somewhere, often it was in bins of clothes etc. Every now and then we would find crusted pieces of bread somewhere. I don't recall her biting a person out of anger. I did this experiment. I was watching tv and had my friends come into my house through a window with ski-masks and I heard her bark a little and I was like, wait what's going on.. I walk into my room where my friend's came in and there she was, Bailey, on her back with my friends giving her belly rubs. At least I knew if someone broke in, she would at least bark for a second.. Gawl! She was a good dog. I often talk about her because of how well behaved she was and how much she means to me.  She had this thing about you throwing her toy down the stairs and she would run down and get it and this would go on for a couple hours. She would never get tired of it, she loved it so much. Well when her last year she was old. She had a hard time going up the stairs and going down and often would fall down them. It was really hard to see her struggle. When I visited my mom's house I often carried her where she needed to go so I wouldn't have to see her plop down onto the floor.

You may be asking, "well isn't Bailey the family pet and how did she and I become so close?" The answer is yes she was the family dog. I like to think that we were close from the day we got her. We went to Indiana to pick her up from the breeder when we lived back in Alabama and on the way back, we had this conversion van and I was lying on the floor in between the captain seats and Bailey was on my chest sleeping. We ended up having her be put in my room a lot of the time. Mostly because I would let her sleep on the pillow next to mine, and we became roommates. You know, a lot of people think a dog is just a dog and they don't deserve a purpose but I promise you that isn't the case. A dog will bring joy on the bad days, and will make you angry when they get into the trash (she was notorious for that). But really though it teaches us how to truly care for something that is so temporary. It teaches us responsibility, how to care and to love unconditionally, and when the time comes, it teaches us how about death and how to cope with a loss of something that was so dear to us (unless you experienced it with a family member or someone close to you already).

 I often hear people say, "I will never get another dog, putting mine down was too hard", I just can't help shaking my head and being that's the wrong way to look at it. I think getting another dog or pet after losing the one is honoring them. You see animals being mistreated all the time and what better way of helping them by bringing them into your home and caring for them and putting them in a better situation that they were in prior. I know Bailey can never be replaced, but she can be honored by caring for another dog and loving it as I did her. I miss my dog dearly, she was my best friend from the time I was 15 til I was 28. I think about her all the time. Well this one is for you Bailey. Thank you for the good memories and for being such a wonderful dog and for being my dog. Until we meet again my friend. Love you!

Life is a ride.. Hope this will help you to enjoy it a little more..

Over my life I had a small amount of friends who have killed themselves over life and depression... This entry is dedicated to them.. I wish I knew what they were going through just so I could at least try to help them before it was too late. Guys, this one is for you...


"Take a 10-30 minute walk every day and as you walk, smile."

As you are smiling while walking I just feel such a great feeling. I'm not going anywhere that's intended but I am just looking at this beautiful creation that god made. I don't have any cares nor worries while I walk but I should do it more often.


"Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day"

When I am in silence my mind is clear and you can hear the things that no one else hears while the tv is on, while they are listening to music, or as they are talking. My window of my bedroom has a swamp cooler and beyond that is the pool.. as I sit in silence in my room I can hear birds chirping, the water gently splashes against the side of the pool, and I hear the wind brush against the trees.. Its very peaceful.. GREAT FOR READING AND WRITING TOO!!!!!


"Live with the 3 E's.. Energy, Enthusiasm, Empathy, and the 3 F's.. Faith, Family, Friends."

All these things are positive things that will give you a charge in your life of happiness and joy. I cannot tell you how much being empathetic means to me. It is such a great talent have. To be able to understand what people are going through by putting yourself in their shoes. It is a great thing to do when you are in health care. I think if doctors, nurses, and aides were sympathetic along with empathetic I think that hospital would be placed on the top.

My family and friends know what they mean to me because I tell them every day. I think I would be lost if I didn't have my friends nor family in my life. I feel so blessed for the friends and family I do have. Just having someone to listen to you when you are down or someone you can go to when you need a helping hand is a wonderful thing.


"Spend more time with more people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6"

The people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6 are very special to me. I deal with a lot of people at my job whom are over the age of 70 and when you get them talking you do not want them to be quiet. They experienced many things in their lives and have wonderful stories. They may be jerks because they are old and don't want to be living while their loved one already passed on but if you get them to open up to you, you just gave yourself a gift. For the people under 6 they are so curious about everything. They are full of love and excitement over the smallest things and its a great way to be. I know when life gets us down we tend to mope around and complain.. but to these individuals they cry for about 5 minutes and see something that excites them and the negative is forgotten.


"Dream more while you are awake"

Dreams are what makes life tolerable. I know without dreams we wouldn't be where we are today. The immigrants in this country had dreams for their families because they wanted something better so they came to the U.S. For people who have very high paying jobs had dreams to be successful and rich. Everyone has dreams. Some may be hard to reach but its possible.


"Try to make at least 3 people smile each day"

If you make someone smile you brought some happiness in their life. Whatever someone is going through a smile just made a difference. I never smiled at someone without that individual smiling back. Its a blessing to me when I have people smile at me. Just feels like a silent compliment and when I smile back its a silent thank you.


"Realize that life is a school.. and you are here to learn and to pass all your tests. The good moments, the sad moments, your problems and trials are all part of the curriculum that appear and fade away just like algebra class but the lessons that you will learn will last a life time"

When you are feeling down or depressed. Those feelings are just temporary. Something new and exciting will enter your life like a silent freight train and you will be so happy you may cry. I know when I am sad that I will be happy again. However when you are happy something bad can happen where it takes away that happiness and and bring tears of sadness and sorrow roll down your cheeks and you may get angry. I know that when my moods change from events in my life the mood I am currently in will not be permanent but the thing that everyone should learn is to how to deal with the change.. If something bad happens how are you going to react. And when something good happens, how is it going to make you smile and happy? Just remember no matter what happens brace yourself for the worst.
"And it came to pass, not to stay" [My friend Ashlee]



"Life isn't fair, but it's still good"

No matter what happens in life just remember that this isn't it.. Most of us are only here under a century and after that we will be either in heaven or in hell. Life is too short to say its bad. Life is what you make it. Remember to roll with the punches, try not to kill anyone, and to smile than maybe you will get into heaven ;-).


"Life is too short to waste time hating anyone."

Just try to remember people are mean because of the things that are going on in their life. No one is mean coming out of the womb. Just like a pit bull isn't mean unless the owner treated it badly to make it mean. We shouldn't hate the person for their actions.. We should hate what caused the person to do those actions. We should never hate anyone.. We should be sympathetic and empathetic. Life is just a small amount of time compared to the time we will have in our our life after death.


"Don't take yourself seriously. No one else does."

If you are too serious and don't know how to have fun then you will have a hard time making friends and a hard time trying to be with other people because no one likes to have someone next to them with a chip on their shoulder.. I know I don't. Take time to breathe and relax when you're stressed and when you're angry.. remove yourself from the situation and cool down before you say or do something which you will regret. When someone is angry or is stressed out it makes the ones around that person feel uncomfortable and uneasy.


"You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagreements."

If you really think about it arguing is nothing but a fight with words. If you take a topic and you have 2 different opinions then you will probably get the people to clash and raise voices. There are going to be little facts about the topic that both parties will agree on.. Try to agree and leave it as your opinion. Friends have been lost because of fighting and arguments. I wish I still had them as a friend.


"Make peace with your past, so it won't mess up the present."

I know its really hard but you need to forgive yourself for your actions that you have done before you can move forward in life. If you don't you're going to have the guilt weigh you down like a ball and chain and you're going to be miserable. We all make mistakes but the beauty of it is.. we learn something from each mistake.. Just make sure you try not to make the same mistake, you help others from making that very same mistake, and you forgive yourself from making that mistake... You will be amazed by the feeling you get when you forgive yourself.


"Don't compare your life with others'. You have no idea what their journey is about."

Everyone's situation in life is different. If you worry about "keeping up with the Jones'" then how can you ever better yourself.. You need to stop in front of a mirror and look at yourself and think about your life is going to be like and start from there. No one is rich nor happy from the beginning.. We came out of the womb without any clothes on and we were crying.. No one has walked out with an Armani suit on with a Gucci watch and laughing while talking on their blackberry.. Just remember to worry about yourself and try not to get into debt and if you are in debt then to pay your debt on time and just live life to the fullest.. The richer you are spiritually more better off you're gonna be just for the fact we cannot take the materialistic things with us when we die.


"Burn the candles, use the nice sheets. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special."

We aren't going to live on this earth forever. We need to make the most we can each day because no one knows when their time is going to be up. We just need to live one life at a time and hope we will wake up as we go to sleep every night.. and if you don't wake up and you're being welcomed by your family through the other end you won't have any regrets from living your life because you've made the best of it.


"Forgive everyone for everything."

No matter what someone does to you or someone that is close to you, you should always forgive them. Everyone is responsible for his' and her's actions. If you are offended or treated badly by someone.. brush it off and forgive them in the long run they will be judged for their wrong doing when the time comes for them to be seated in front of Heavenly Father and our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. If you retaliate in a negative way then you will be judged.. Rememeber two wrongs do not make a right.


"What people think of you is none of your business."

What only matters is what you think of yourself. If you live a good life and are a good person to others and you are willing to help and serve the people who are need of help if you have the time.. then you have nothing to worry about.. If you like the way you are then it shouldn't bother what others think of you. Some people may say bad things.. IGNORE THEM.. They are trying to get a rise out of you by saying mean things.


"Time heals almost everything. Give time, time."

Its hard to realize that there will be many changes through out our lives; some great, some good, some bad and some down right awful.. Some things are best taken care of by letting time take its course and wait for it to pass by.. Some people may get pissed off and be really angry at you but they will cool down and you may be mad at someone else.. but you will cool down yourself and you won't have those bad feelings for that person anymore.


"Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful, or joyful."

Whats the point of holding on to something that you don't use nor happy about other than taking up space for something better? Some things are hard to let go but if they mean something to you then keep it but only in storage.. If it has imprtance then you would have it when you want to go back to it.. If you don't use it often.. Like baby clothes, toys, things that you can give to your future children, etc.


"Believe. The best is yet to come."

At times its hard to remember the famous philosophy "whatever goes up must come down".. When you are in a rut and/or down in the dumps just remember its not going to be forever.. You will be happy again.. But brace yourself.. That happiness can be taken away as fast as you received it.


"No matter how you feel, Get up, Dress up, and Show up."

When you just need time to relax do so but don't make it a habit where you are lazy. If you go out and socialize you will be surprised how many friends you are going to make. Just remember to go ahead and go out once in a while.. Treat yourself.. It will be worth it.


"Call your family often."

No one and nothing is more important than your family. If you are in help or need.. Go to your family. I can always go to my parents and my brothers who are very sweet and caring for eachother. I am blessed to have a suche caring family. At times it may be hard to keep in touch but try to talk to each of your family members once a week so you don't lose a close relationship and if you do not have a relationship then this is a good way to start one.


Remember that this is not Disney World and you certainly do not want a fast pass. Make the most of it and enjoy the ride. For my friends that are no longer with me because of life's challanges I am sorry for the bad deck of cards life has dealt for you and I hope you guys are happier up above. I am really sorry for the hard times you had in life that made you do what you have done. You're always going to be missed and never will be forgotten. Don't ever think I was nor am mad about the final choice you've chosen for the reason why you aren't with us today. When it is my time to end this life and go on with eternal life I hope I will see you on the other side and are happier. I am very sorry guys and for the heartache your family members had to bear during that rough time..

Would you agree if I have told you that everyone is their own worst critic??

When someone asks me what I think about myself I will tell them more negatives than postitive. There are many things that I love about myself but there are many that I hate. Tonight I was trying to talk to a friend of mine on the phone and she wouldn't pick up.. When I have asked her politely to pick up through text.. She tells me she sounds like a guy due to being sick (Which she doesn't.. she sounds like an angel to me ;-D).

A girl will say that she looks fat, looks or sounds like a guy, she is ugly, she is blah... even though to the people that get to look at her think she is the most beautiful thing anyone has ever seen.A lot of people look at celebrities in magazines as people we should be more like.. Are they cool? YES, Are they rich? YES but, do you know them as a human being and not as a sex symbol in movies and in the media? I honestly think a person should be measured by how they treat their peers and people around them and not by their wealth snd/or popularity.

We all know that this life isn't permanent. We all are going to die some day and when that day comes.. What do you think you are going to take with you? A rolex that you had on your wrist at formal get togethers, the sweet Bentley Continental GT that you've spent 180,000 dollars on just to get you to Point A to Point B? No.. All we can take with us are the memories of having those things. I believe each person will be judged on how we were towards other people. Did we take the time to listen to other's problems? When this person needed help, how much help did we give that person and how much more could we have given to him or her? I know this life is going to kick you in the gut when things start to go south just like the economy but you have to stay positive and remember that there is so much more after this life.I believe in being kind, caring, loving, etc. is very attractive and sexy.. just like a girl wearing her hair down while cuddling during a movie with me with her painted toes sticking inside of my sock to keep her feet warm.. That is a very simple thing and yet its the most sexiest thing ever. I don't know why we think badly about ourselves but we do.. its in human-nature but I don't think its supposed to happpen. I don't think its right. I think if you are a good person with a big heart then you're awesome and no one should ever say a negative thing towards you.

I just wish that someday we can use the eyes of other's to look through as we see ourself in the mirror. I think life would be a lot easier if that was possible.